Let go, let go of perfect…

Perfect… what a word. I have suffered for years, actually longer than that, since I was a kid, I was obsessed with being perfect. I wanted the perfect family, not the broken one I was dealt. I wanted to be the perfect daughter. I would try and try, but somehow always fell short. I wanted to be the perfect sister. I may be a great sister, but I’m still not perfect. I wanted to be the perfect student, but I was a great student, I am still remembered by several teachers, but I didn’t make the grades. I want to be the perfect wife. The perfect friend. I want perfect teeth and perfect hair. I need to have the latest items, to have the perfect outfit. I strive for perfection everyday, and the days I fall short I tear myself apart. I over analyze where I went wrong and obsess on fixing it. I have become to emotionally abusive to myself over the years. I mean come on how hard can it be to be perfect? Well I can say I am finally trying to overcome perfection. Let’s be honest no one is perfect. They may put on a shoe for you, so you think they have the perfect life, but they still have flaws. I am realizing that I will never be perfect or come close to being perfect. I am starting to let go of the idea that perfect is what people want. The more I realize, the more I know. Teachers don’t want the perfect student they want a student who is trying to be successful. Parents expect you to make mistakes, because they did. I’m not saying I am over wanting to be perfect, but I’m finally realizing being perfect isn’t as great as it seems!

I recently got a tattoo of a unalome with locus flower. The unalome symbol represents the path to enlightenment in the Buddhist culture. The spirals are meant to symbolize the twists and turns in life, and the straight lines the moment one reaches enlightenment or peace and harmony. The dots at the end of the symbol represent death, or the moment we fade to nothing. Unalome symbol, the spiral at the bottom represents the eye, and also our lives which are given to us without any direction. We are the only ones who have to discover our way. The path that goes up which looks like a line with knots represents every spiritual milestone of our lives. The knots are lessons that we have to overcome to reach the lotus flower at the top. The locus flower stands for perfection which in the Hindu religion represents Moksha or Enlightenment and in the Buddhist religion is knows as Nirvana. The story behind these two words is that when we reach the top and open our spiritual lotus we are free from the circle of birth and death, and rebirth.

This tattoo is a reminder to overcome perfection.